I Rub My Wormie Review

by June 9, 2012
filed under Sex & Dating

I Rub My WormieOne of the things that first attracted me to this worm was the cuteness factor. I have to say that when I opened the package, this little green bug definitely lived up to that! There he was: Nestled inside some pretty adorable packaging that made him appear as though he was in a garden. He looked up at me with cute blue eyes, pleading with me to hold him. It wasn’t long before I was doing exactly that – and this was where I began to realize that a cute toy doesn’t always equal a great toy.

Unfortunately, what in the packaging had seemed like cute eyes now seemed a little creepy. I’m not entirely sure what I had expected, but when I think of worms and bugs, I think of squishy. This worm was nothing short of hard and smooth; my guess is because he’s constructed from PVC. I did like his shape, however. I could see a multitude of possibilities for play, especially from the raised balls than ran the entire length of his 5″ body and were supposed to represent his legs. I could see these bringing some much needed texture to the party. It wasn’t long before I had installed the single AA battery needed for him to run, and had him ready to go to work burrowing where only a select few do.

To turn him on takes nothing more than a simple push of a button – which is found at the base of his tail. My little friend had three speed settings, all controlled via said button – and I have to tell you I was really disappointed when he came to life. Not only were the vibrations weak on all setting, but worst of all he was super noisy. Never one to give up easily, I set about getting in some personal time with my new found friend. Maybe I would dig him after a while.

Some good points about the worm, however: He is very versatile because of his shape (he’s not the largest toy in the world, which makes him easy to hold in your hand). He’s really easy to clean, and is waterproof. I figured I would try him in the shower, which would cut down the noise factor – but to no avail. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t dig this worm. He just refuses to entertain me with more than a slight tingle.

However, the worm does work as a great massager for your muscles. He’s really easy to hide in plain sight, if you’re taking traveling. But the biggest downside is that he seems to be more of a real toy than a sex toy. If you have friends with younger kids like I do, don’t leave him near them. It seems they all just want to take him home, much to the amusement of their mothers. This is one of those toys that is a great idea conceptually, but falls down in its execution. The worm was yet to give me an orgasm (and believe me, it wasn’t for lack of trying). To me, this is more something that I would likely give a friend as a gag gift.

Well, at least I have a new back massager.

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